28 Reasons Living in SF Ruins You. (just kidding)
1. Mission-Style Burritos Will Turn You Into A Major Burrito Snob
All other burritos will just start to taste like sad lumps of food stuff wrapped in a tortilla.
2. Fast Food Just Isn’t The Same Anywhere Else
You actually expect it to be high quality and taste good, which is apparently unreasonable.
3. You’ll Become That Person With Wine
Hmm… hints of oak… a floral bouquet… definitely from Napa Valley…
4. And You’ll Refuse To Touch Subpar Sushi
You want to go out for sushi in Chicago? Really? What ocean borders Chicago?
5. If Studio Rent Is Less Than A Grand, You Wonder What’s Wrong With It
It turns out, nothing is wrong with it…except that it’s not in the Bay Area.
6. You Don’t Get Culture Shock When You Travel, You Are The Culture Shock
In the Bay Area you’re average, normal, even boring. Everywhere else… total weirdo.
7. No One Else Does Ice Cream Sandwiches Right
Not everything measures up to It’s-It, Scoop, or CREAM ice cream sandwiches.
8. Casual Friday Is Every Day
You can’t even remember the last time you wore something that wasn’t jeans to work.
9. You’ll Never Be Able To Deal With Bad Weather Again
And most people will laugh at you if you say a fifty degree day in winter is “pretty chilly.”
10. Fresh Produce Is Always In Season
And you can find it literally anywhere because it’s all grown in your backyard.
11. So You Stop Expecting To Pay More For Organic And Local
And then you see the prices at a store outside the Bay Area and swear you can feel your wallet wither up and die in your pocket.
12. Not Everywhere Else Has Access To All The Nature All The Time
Mountains, desert, forest, and ocean are all super easy day trips. A couple hours (or less) in the car in any direction, and you’re there.
13. Which Makes The Longer Drive To Yosemite For Nature Seem Like A Chore
Instead of what it is to everyone else—a nice relaxing vacation.
14. Living In An Open-Minded Utopian Bubble Makes Anywhere Else Will Feel Like A Hick Town
No place is totally perfect, but you can be who you want, look how you want, and love who you want to love without the same fear of consequences you’d face elsewhere.
15. The Giants Are Ridiculously Awesome
Oh, another World Series win? No big deal.
16. And If Football Is Your Thing, You’ve Always Been Covered
Between the 49ers and the Raiders, there are no boring Sundays in the Bay Area.
17. People Even Actually Care About Soccer
It may not be as American as football, baseball, and apple pie, but when you have a team like the Earthquakes in your corner, why not?
18. And That Doesn’t Even Cover Indoor Sports
Watching the Sharks in the playoffs and cheering on the Warriors is enough to keep you busy all winter long. Bay Area sports fans are totally spoiled for life.
19. You Don’t Even Realize How In Shape You Are
…until you stop biking those hills everyday.
20. You’ll Be Totally Unprepared For Any Amount Of Snow
Because snow has always just been that fun thing on top of mountains, not the gross thing that blocks your driveway that you have to scrape off your car in the morning.
21. And A Truly Hot Summer Will Completely Mess With Your Head
All those gorgeous mild summer days? Not exactly the norm most places.
22. You’ll Never Be Able To Eat Mediocre Bread Again
Not after you get hooked on baguettes from Acme or Tartine Bakery’s loaves.
23. You Can Eat Your Way Around The World In One Day
Where else can you find multiple regional styles of Indian, Spanish, Chinese, Japanese, Brazilian, Moroccan, French, Mexican and just about any other food without ever getting in your car?
24. You’ve Been Invited To A Party Every Night For The Past Five Years
And they’re better and crazier than anywhere else.
25. You’re Used To Knowing The Best New Musicians Before They’re Big
How does one adjust to life after being a walking Pitchfork article before it becomes a Pitchfork article?
26. And The Best Artists Before They’re Ever In A Museum
They were still selling prints for $50 at a coffee shop or they just booked their first gallery show when you “discovered” them.
27. Hella Will Forever Be A Part Of Your Vocabulary
It’s like it’s not even a word you’re consciously saying anymore. It’s more of a verbal tic.
28. You’re So Progressive, It Feels Like Everywhere Else Is Stuck In Slo-Mo
The Bay Area moves a little faster than elsewhere, whether it’s through protests to further human rights or innovative technology. And it sometimes makes it feel like the rest of the world is moving at a snail’s pace.